SEARCH RESULTS

On a recent hiking expedition with my son in West Virginia, we came across something unexpected on the trail to Seneca Rocks. The trail to Seneca Rocks is an ascent of about 1,000 feet to a jagged ridge overlooking valleys on both sides. It's a beautiful trail filled with wildlife. On our trip, we encountered a doe and her two fawns eating along the trail. They were obviously accustomed to humans because we were able to walk very close to them without disturbing them. About halfway up, we came across something we often see along the side of roads but very rarely on a trail. It was a white cross, memorializing the death of a young man. There wasn't much information about him except for the date he died or even if he died on the trail itself, but it did make us stop and wonder. These sorts of encounters make people think about a number of things, I suppose, but for me, because of my sab batical mindset, I began to think about what legacy I would leave if someone came across my cross someplace on a lonely mountain? When I speak of legacy in the Christian sense, I'm not talking about anything necessarily physical that remains to remind people how wonderful and kind I was or wasn't. What I am talking about is the type of legacy that Jesus alluded to in Matthew 6. “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.   For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21 Of course, I believe every Christian should strive to leave a godly legacy behind them. This would include being a good example in your community and living a life of faith so that your children and grandchildren can see Jesus in you. It would include using your spiritual gifts to their maximum capacity to glorify God in addition to finding a place to do ministry in every, and I mean every season of life. It would include working hard with your hands as the Bible instructs us because everything we do we do unto the Lord. It would include showing real, unashamed, Holy Spirit empowered love to everyone we meet. It would include these things and more. You probably have your list and if you don't, why not? Are we not supposed to live with purpose? For me, because my calling is in pastoral ministry, I have to think about another legacy that I leave. Paul instructs Timothy to do something unique as a pastor. And what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful men, who will be able to teach others also. 2 Timothy 2:2 Pastors today, wear so many hats. We are expected to be experts in the Scriptures, effective public speakers, extraordinary administrators, wise counselors, computer and internet wizards. We have to be perfect husbands and have trained our children to be completely obedient in every situation. Most pastors have some musical talents, even if it just means leading the hymns from behind the pulpit on any given Sunday. Yet, Paul's instructions here have little to do with those qualifications. Paul's instruction is simply pass on what you know (whether you are an expert or not) to the next generation. Make sure that they are faithful with the Word so they can pass it on next generation. As I contemplate jumping back into full-time ministry in the next few weeks, one thing that lays heavy on my mind is my time management. In my twilight years of ministry, I want to focus leaving a legacy like the one that Paul instructed Timothy to leave. I don't want to be known as the busy Pastor. I don't wanna leave a legacy (though it sounds good) of being a pastor that met People's needs. The legacy that I need to focus on, more so now than ever, is the legacy of the Word of God. I want to spend my time entrusting what God has given me to others who will pick up the ball and do the same. So if you are part of my congregation, will you help me? No Pastor is good enough, smart enough or blessed enough to leave this sort of legacy without a faithful church family. I guess the ultimate goal is to leave a legacy together – to add our names to the long list in Hebrews 11. There is no greater gift that we have been given than God's Word. There is no greater gift that we have been entrusted with to pass on to the next generation so they can see the glorious Works of our God and King . So I make this covenant with you. I will dabble in some administration and counseling. I will get my toes wet with polishing up my preaching in producing some cool graphics for the sermon series. But one thing I will not compromise on is passing God's Word to the next generation. I'm not looking for anything physical: a name on a building, piles of money in the bank, even a cross on a mountain side. I'm looking for God to grant me faithfulness so that my life not only impacts this generation but the next and the next and the... We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD, his power and the wonders he has done." Psalm 78:4

One of the questions my congregation asked me before I left on sabbatical was, in essence, "What are you most looking forward to?" My answer was worship. As I explained to my congregation, it's difficult for a pastor to experience worship outside of his job. Of course, we are able to worship on Sundays, but we also have other responsibilities on our minds, like preparation and actually leading the service. So, we can worship, but it's different. Even when we go away for a vacation, it's difficult to get out of pastoral mode. As we sit in another congregation unnoticed, questions will go through our minds: "I would've preached that differently," "We should try that worship song in our services," or "I like this order of service better than our order of service." I was really looking forward to worshiping in church for an extended period of time as just a regular guy and not a pastor. It did take a number of weeks to fully get out of "pastoral mode," but what I experienced was no less than amazing. What I experienced was freedom from that which often held me back from truly expressing worship to God. All the questions that my mind goes through regarding preparation became secondary and then eventually went away. This worship that I experienced wasn't just enjoying the singing and a well-crafted sermon. It was something deeper. It was a connection to God where it was just me experiencing Him as Phil, not as Pastor Phil. This is not to say that this experience of worship was better than when I worship with my own congregation, but it was different. I only have four more weeks left until I return to my congregation, and I am a bit torn. In some ways, I cannot wait to get back to my people to worship with them again, but in other ways, I cherish these last four weeks of worship as just Phil. Let me drop back into pastoral mode for a moment and ask a question because, given my recent experience, I am perplexed. Here's the question, and forgive me if it sounds harsh, but it is something I cannot understand or reconcile in my mind: If you claim to be a follower of Jesus, why do you choose not to come to worship on a regular basis? Or to put it another way: What things distract or take priority over worshiping with God's people? It's a valid question because I've seen it over 45 years of ministry where people who love the Lord don't seem to prioritize worship on a regular basis. To be honest, I see the toll on their lives and families when a regular discipline of worship is ignored. So what exactly is it? I don't profess to be the most faithful Christian that ever lived, but I cannot imagine myself not making every effort to worship the one who died for me. Given my recent experience of worship, I believe that all the more. And given the state of the church in America, I believe this is one of the greatest problems that we face because God created us to worship. So if we are not worshiping Him with God's people on a regular basis, I can almost guarantee that we are spending that time worshiping something else. Jesus put it this way: For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:21) Where is your heart? What is more important than worship? Do you long to worship Him? If not, we need to check our relationship with Him. We need to examine if we are idolaters, giving our hearts over to something else. David said in Psalm 63 that his soul thirsts for God, but what I see too often is a soul that accommodates God—we just fit Him in after the "other stuff" is taken care of. Is the following your experience? O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you,as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory.Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. So I will bless you as long as I live;in your name I will lift up my hands. (Psalm 63:1-4) We live in a dry and weary land where there is no water. We struggle as our flesh faints, telling us we should draw near to God, but rather than looking to His sanctuary for what we need, we look to things that bring no satisfaction and then turn around and blame God. On any given Sunday, many Christians will wake up and bow to the god of "I just needed to sleep in," the god of "I stayed up too late last night," the god of "Let's go out to breakfast or the golf course," and a myriad of others. We then wonder why no one sees Jesus consistently in our lives when the answer is simple. We don't thirst for Him because of these other strange gods we worship. Let me give you a list of suggestions that I plan on implementing in my life as well because there is a danger that I have a god on Sunday that I worship rather than the true God. I've alluded to it. It is the god of professionalism, also known as the god of control everything. The danger for me is to focus so much on my pastoral mode that I miss the opportunity to connect with God as Phil. Of course, I need to perform in the calling that God has given me, but one need not exclude the other. STEP ONE:  Stop making excuses. When you choose to (and it is a choice) worship another god on Sunday, then call it what it is: idolatry. Experience the forgiveness of Jesus, and move on to choose obedience. STEP TWO:  Take the Scriptures at face value. Stop believing the lie that it is an option to go to worship and be part of the body of Christ. As I have said many times before, the Bible is not a book of suggestions. God commands us to do certain things most often because those things are good for us to aid in our growth. When we choose disobedience, we should not be surprised when things don't go well for us. When we feel that the Lord is not near to us, when we feel our faith falter, when we have no desire to read the Scriptures, when we see our wives, husbands, or children slip away from Jesus—these things are connected. If you don't believe me, here is the command to obey: Do not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. (Hebrews 10:25) STEP THREE:  Discern the reason why you don't attend regularly or why you can't focus while you are at worship. Are you going to bed too late? Is your life so busy and complicated that you cannot control your thought life? Just go through all the reasons why you don't and ask why you do. STEP FOUR:  Get up and go. If you can't accomplish that on your own, find a brother or sister who can hold you accountable and call you every Sunday to wake you up and get you off your tush. The final question to ask if you can't do that is this: Do I really love Jesus, or is there another? Jesus clearly said that if we love Him, we will do what He commands (John 14:15). You can't love both Jesus and those other Sunday gods, and neither can I (Matthew 6:24). STEP FIVE:  Encourage others to worship with you. Maybe even commit Psalm 95 to memory. It is an awesome song calling worshipers to gather together to glorify God. Oh come, let us sing to the LORD; let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation!Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise!For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods. In his hand are the depths of the earth; the heights of the mountains are his also. The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land. Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the LORD, our Maker! For he is our God, and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts, as at Meribah,as on the day at Massah in the wilderness, when your fathers put me to the test and put me to the proof, though they had seen my work. My brothers and sisters, children of the risen King, let's not make the mistake of missing the main purpose of why we exist: to worship. I cannot wait till this Sunday. I cannot wait to worship with my congregation again. I pray that you too will thirst for Him.

The world is not as it should be, and neither am I. The past few weeks have been pretty tough on many people. On a national level, the church has felt the weight of a martyr with the shocking assassination of Charlie Kirk. Even in my church a young man passed away this week. This was sudden and I know that many in my church are stuggling with this, not to mention his family who lost a son. The events of the past week shook us. I noticed I began to cry uncontrollably. Maybe you have felt like this too? This lack of composure wasn't only because of the events this week, but it was cumulative. It was the emotional stress of 45 years of ministry that I have, admittedly, buried in a very unhealthy way to appear more “professional.” I wonder how often we bury the hurt and pain so we won't feel it or to keep a false smile on our faces. For me, all the pain that I have taken on, the pain others have felt, my own personal sufferings and betrayals, the anger that I pushed down that should have been expressed in a healthy way, the times that I simply wanted to burst out and cry with someone but had to push it down deep so I could function in a way that would serve them. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that any of these things I did are good, nor are they healthy at all. What I am trying to say is that time away from ministry has opened my eyes to a burden that pastors have that we are not even aware of ourselves. We run on adrenaline 24/7 to keep doing ministry, convincing ourselves we are serving God with our whole lives and with excellence. And while that may be our heart, it's not what God desires. This is the whole point of a sabbatical: to develop a rhythm in life so we don't burn ourselves out or run on adrenaline until we eventually have a heart attack. This is not just speculation. Just do a little research on illnesses that are stress-related to pastoral ministry. We are not a healthy section of society, and we make excuses that sound spiritual when, in reality, they are far from what Jesus wants for us. I suspect that this problem is not unique to pastors though it may manifest in different ways. How many of us run on adrenaline at work pushing ourselves for that extra buck or promotion? Maybe we convince ourselves that this is what our family needs or what will make me successful in the eyes of the world. The result is not different if we are doing these things because we say we love God, our family or want to be the best we can be. That life is not wnat Jesus wants for us. He promised abundant life, not a busy life. Sometimes we need others to tell us that our sprituality is not very spiritual ay all. I was reminded of a previous time in ministry when I was under so much stress that I ended up spending a week in the hospital. Technically, I had diverticulitis, but they couldn't find any specific causes for it outside of the stress I was under. Since then, over 10 years ago, I have not had diverticulitis. I certainly don't want to experience that again, and I really want to serve the Lord in a way that is healthy and filled with His power, rather than my ability. So, I took the advice that I often give to others when they feel overwhelmed by life or confused by the circumstances they are going through: Go get some counseling. I am one counseling session in. There were no great epiphanies. There was no greater understanding or information that I didn't already know. Yet, the very process of talking out these things with a person who has gone through some of the same stuff is liberating. Every human being is broken and wounded. We are broken and wounded by the stuff that happens to us because of the brokenness in our world. We are broken when we choose to sin against God by not applying the principles He has given us for our lives and thus become part and parcel of an increasingly broken life. We are all broken and wounded, and though I have been called to serve God full-time, I still sometimes choose to embrace my brokenness rather than the abundant life that Jesus offers us. Pray for me and I will pray for you. Yet, this truism doesn't get us off the hook as leaders in the church. It doesn't mean that we don't serve people with everything that we have. It doesn't mean that we ignore our pain, suffering, and hurt. It doesn’t mean that we don’t strive to love and sacrifice, treating others over self (Philippians 2:3-4). It means that we recognize that we are both wounded and called to heal. It means that we have to be balanced in our lives. Serving God with all that we have AS HE LEADS US. This is the key: To discern When God is leading me from when I am taking on things on my own. One leads to burnout the other to fruitfulness. One leads to dispair the other to life. These past weeks have been bad for so many. We see the brokenness in the world. We see the havoc sin brings to the world. Maybe we’ve seen the ugliness in our own hearts that has been brought to the surface because of these recent events. The world is not as it should be, and neither am I. So, I will continue with the counseling because I need to learn more about myself through the eyes of another who is broken, just like me. I want to be who God wants me to be. I want to be the most effective wounded healer that I can be, pointing others to the Great Healer who was wounded for me. He was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds, we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all. (Isaiah 53:5-6)

A view of Acro-Corinth from the lower city One of the places I wanted to see while we were in the Athens area was the ancient city of Corinth. The books of First and Second Corinthians are not only filled with spiritual depth and vital principles but also with information to live a life worthy of our calling today. One of the things that drew me to the Christian faith was its foundation in real history. The events described truly occurred, grounding our faith not in myths or superior philosophy, but in historical reality. Visiting these places strengthens my faith. Less than 5% of ancient Corinth has been excavated, but what has been found is impressive. Paul stayed in Corinth for a year and a half, teaching the word of God. This is where he met Aquila and supported the ministry through tent-making. In Acts chapter 18, we read that those opposed to Paul united in an attack and brought him to the place of judgment. They accused him of "persuading the people to worship God in ways contrary to the law." The proconsul Gallio judged that this was not a matter for Rome but something to be settled among themselves, and he dismissed the accusers. Today, along the edge of the agora, there are many remains of shops that line the outer rim. One of these may have been where Paul sold his tents. The Bema (Rostra) or judgment seat is still there, along with the post where those found guilty were whipped. This is the exact spot where Paul defended the gospel in a hostile environment. These connections to historical events and my spiritual forefathers speak volumes about the reality of what happened. We know these things because of the meticulously recorded Scriptures. But there are others whose names and deeds are lost to history, yet they still impacted eternity. One remarkable remnant in Corinth is an inscription in front of the ancient theatre ruins: ERASTVS PRO. AED. S. P. STRAVIT Which means, "Erastus, in return for his aedileship, paved it at his own expense." According to Romans 16:23, Erastus was a manager of household affairs, technically a treasurer in Corinth. He traveled with Paul and was sent with Timothy into Macedonia. Later, he became an Aedile in the city. The name Erastus is uncommon, so this inscription almost certainly refers to the biblical Erastus. We know little about him, only his name. As I stood there in the heat, staring at this inscription, I couldn't help but wonder about the other believers in the city whose names and ministries are lost to time. Only God knows their names. "The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out." - John 10:3 We go through life seeking meaning, striving to be remembered or to make a mark. We want people to see us. But the truth is, for most of us, these strivings will be forgotten, and our names will be lost to time. I see this often in the church. Fellow pastors and I sometimes strive for worldly success, believing that large churches, grandiose ministries, books, sermon series, and buildings will be remembered long after we're gone. The reality is they won’t. We often waste our lives on the wrong things. These things are good but not the best. God does not remember Erastus for the theatre he built or the inscription he left. God remembers Erastus for his faithfulness—his trust in Jesus and his boldness to complete the race set for him. As a small church pastor, I confess that I often get jealous of larger churches or more “successful” ministries. I feel called to small churches, not large ones, but I still struggle with the question, "Am I successful?" I spend a lot of mental energy worrying about whether what I am doing has a real impact. I know that God looks at the heart and that real spiritual growth can't be quantified by numbers but by increases in faith, which are often under the surface and subjective. Yet my flesh says, "Phil, you need to be remembered, so make an impact that everyone can see." I struggle because, in my heart, I simply want to please Jesus and Him alone. I want to be remembered by Jesus for my faithfulness to His call. I pray for great discernment in ministry to distinguish between what is a memorial to God and what is a tower of Babel. One is impressive and reaches to the sky; the other is just a pile of rocks that few notice—except God. Erastus left an inscription. I will leave one too, but it won’t be incised in stone. It will be in a more precious place. "See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands." - Isaiah 49:16 I’ll strive for that. CORINTH GALLERY (The Temple of Apollo, At Corinth, Remains of a Byzantine church built on top of the Bema, Agora shops, The Erasus Inscription, The stone Bema and post.)

At Ephesus We are excited to be vacationing in the Mediterranean during this sabbatical. One of our stops was in Kusadasi, Turkey. This port city is the gateway to the ancient city of Ephesus, one of the most famous ruins in the ancient world. Despite only 2 to 5% of the city being excavated, significant ruins have been discovered, some of which directly relate to the Scriptures. Part of my journey was to focus on the foundation of my personal faith and how I came to Jesus, coupled with visiting places that were foundational to the start of Christianity. Ephesus is where the apostle John lived out his final years and wrote the epistles contained in the New Testament. This is also the church to which Paul wrote a powerful letter, though there is some debate about whether the book of Ephesians was truly written to the Ephesians. A verse from this letter has defined the core of Christianity for many: "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith — and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God — not by works, so that no one can boast." (Ephesians 2:8-9) Even Jesus himself wrote to this church in Revelation Chapter 3, praising their perseverance yet warning them that they had forsaken their first love. One of the places I was most excited about visiting was the great theater in the city. Historically, the Book of Acts in Chapter 19 tells us that a riot broke out at this very theater because of Paul's preaching. A silversmith named Demetrious, who made silver models of the shrine of Artemis, was losing business because the church was growing. He gathered other artisans and riled up a crowd, eventually grabbing one of Paul's traveling companions and dragging him to the theater. The riot was eventually quieted by the city’s leaders. It was here that the gospel challenged the status quo of the day. I was disappointed that I could not actually stand in the theater because it was under reconstruction, but I did have the chance to see it and walk in other places where the apostle Paul and John most definitely would have. The main thoroughfare from the now silted-in harbor would have been a place where these men walked as they got off the ships that brought them there. The forums and agoras would have been places where they preached and taught the gospel message to those who would hear. Ancient stalls from various businesses line the edges of these agoras. It's possible Paul may have had one of the shops for his own tent-making business, though there is no record of him practicing that in this city like he did in Corinth. However, he certainly would have shopped there. Visiting places like this is a very emotional activity for me. Of course, like most, I enjoy the history, studying the architecture, and the beauty of the place, but it's more than that. Ephesus is the starting place of my spiritual journey in many ways. Without the history that these fallen stones and monuments represent, my faith would never have come to fruition. My faith, and the faith of all Christians, is soundly rooted in history. What we believe are not made-up stories or myths developed over many years, but historical events that people witnessed and told others about contemporaneously. The apostle John knew Jesus and saw him alive after his crucifixion. Paul was radically changed by a vision of Jesus not long after. Both these men preached with boldness what they saw and experienced. Those who came to faith because of their witness to the events of historical Christianity continued to pass on that faith throughout the centuries, person to person, until eventually it came to me and I believed. Now my life has been changed, yes, of course by Jesus, but directly because of the faithfulness of these two men and others who heard their message. This visit was very emotional for me, though I hid it from my traveling companions. Ephesus was a place where my heart cried out in thanksgiving for the sacrifices of those who came before me. I hope to have more experiences like this because I believe they are so important for me, especially as I try to renew my faith in Jesus. As I've gotten older, I have found myself becoming more cynical and jaded in how I think about the world. Like many in our affluent society, we have become so comfortable in our faith and self-sufficiency. We have come to believe that we have accomplished so much on our own, with Jesus helping a little. I have lost the discipline of thanksgiving in my life in many ways. I understand that everything I have—my possessions, my family, my life, my talents, and most importantly, my salvation—all come from Jesus. I understand, but my response often is not what it should be. The only response should be thankfulness. I hope that someday in the future, if some archaeologist discovers the tattered remains of my home and belongings, they see more than a pile of rusted electronics, scattered Legos, and faded pictures. I hope that something remains that shows them Jesus. Something that reminds them of God’s faithfulness through the centuries. Something that might bring a tear to their eyes and cause them to be thankful to a God who still speaks among the ruins. (The Theatre at Ephesus, The main street from the ancient harbor into the city, A view of the ancient agora)

Menauhant Beach, Falmouth I am a little bit over a week into my sabbatical. It has been an interesting, relaxing, yet eye-opening time in so many ways. I planned on these first two weeks to be fairly straightforward—resting, getting some needed sleep, and just enjoying myself, all with the idea of resetting myself. I've had the opportunity to worship in a local church, connect with some old friends, and work with my hands as the Bible instructs (finally got to paint the deck and do some yard cleanup). I've been fixing up a small boat that I got off Facebook Marketplace for cheap. I need something a little bit more stable to fish with rather than my kayak, which is difficult to turn around in to get what I need because of my back issues. I had the opportunity to go to a hunting convention and a car show. The highlight of the time was celebrating the birth of a new granddaughter. The rest of my time has been hiking around the Cape in areas that I grew up in (so much has changed, and not for the better) as well as reading three short books. One of the first books I read was Soul Reset  by Junius B. Dotson. The author defines a soul reset as a "hard stop of chronic busyness; a deep look inward, and an intentional look to God; and a new, more holistic journey forward that more closely resembles an abundant life into which Jesus calls his disciples." Or, in simpler terms, "a time just to be with God, instead of doing things for God." As much as I love the ministry of the gospel, this is where I think leaders lose their spark. We can get so caught up in doing things for God—important things, things people really need from leaders in the church—but if we don't take care of our relationship with Jesus, then ministry, which God intended to bring life and joy, can bring burnout and discouragement. Every single one of us needs to prioritize spending time with God, rather than doing things for God. Both are important, but one is way more important than the other. The most eye-opening line in the book hit me like a freight train. You see, the first part of this week I was still in pastor mode, worrying about what was going on in the church. Were the worship services OK? Did people show up to worship? Did anyone get sick or have any needs that might not be taken care of in my absence? Is anyone falling through the cracks? Then I read this on page 21: "I've carried burdens that didn't belong to me; they belonged to God. I've carried people's problems that didn't belong to me; they belonged to God. I've carried unrealistic views of how others thought a leader should behave, think, and act that didn't belong to me; they belonged to God. I've carried hurt that I should have given to God. I've carried the weight of unrealistic expectations when I should have given them to God. I was operating in my own strength, instead of accessing the kingdom resources that are available to me." This wasn't really new information to me. I've learned this stuff before; I just hadn't practiced what I'd learned. Of course, there are things that belong to me—things that I have responsibility for and the calling for—but there are also things that belong to others—things that are their responsibility alone, and there are things that belong to God. These are things that I have zero responsibility for. A long, healthy, God-driven, and empowered ministry depends on knowing the difference in what belongs to whom. Pastor Dotson includes in his book a series of practices to help develop a consistent practice of resetting your soul. I know some people might be taken aback by this terminology, but whatever you call it, it is a lost skill in much of the pastoral ministry that I see around me. Many of you reading this may not be in church leadership, but the tendency to do rather than be is part of the fallen human condition. Many of us define who we are by what we do and the roles we have. How many of us are so busy with our jobs and responsibilities that the most important job that we have is neglected? If we miss out on getting to know the living God, we have missed out on the main purpose of life. During my sabbatical, I have a lot of plans. Plans to go to different places and do different things, yet in all those places that I go to and things that I do, my greatest desire is that I will know Him in those things. This is key, for if I take a sabbatical and come back still grasping onto the things that are not mine, all the rest and renewal accomplished will be for naught. God, help me to learn the things that are Yours, so that I might not make an idol of my ministry and gifting by taking on things that were never mine to control in the first place. Teach me to draw close to You so I can trust You completely in all the things I cannot control. Photos below "sunset on the beach" "SouthCape Beach Jetty" "Car Show at Simcock Farms" " My Boat in Progress" "My Cape house with newly painted rails"

Many people see the role of being a pastor as a noble calling, filled with purpose and divine mission. From experience, I can confirm it is a humbling experience to sense the call of God on your life. It is also the most exciting job to have—I get to serve God full-time. It is a privilege that very few are called to. Yet, beneath this job lies a web of challenges that few truly understand. Pastors face immense expectations (from others and self) to embody perfect faith, hope, and love while often masking their internal battles so that nobody will look down on us. During my sabbatical so far, I have been reading and discovering some things that aren't necessarily new to me but things that I know haven't taken root consistently in my life. I need to relearn these things. The Weight of Expectations The moment I became a pastor, I was struck with expectations from both the congregation that I served and for myself. I knew I was far from perfect. In fact, I struggled with many things that I preached about in my sermons, but the pressure was on because I knew that the congregation, at least some, viewed me as the guy with all the answers and would be an example of faith and Christian living to follow. In many ways, pastors are put on pedestals behind the pulpit. So far, many pastors, including myself over the years, have spent a lot of energy trying to maintain an ideal image, trying to be the quintessential professional, and always performing their best. Of course, we're supposed to do our best for the Lord. We should strive for excellence in all that we do in ministry, but as I mentioned in my last blog, we're supposed to do our best in the things that belong to us, not take on things that do not belong to us, and in the process live a double life: the pastor who has it all together, and the guy who wants to follow Jesus with all of his sin, brokenness, and second-guessing. Statistics reveal that about 70% of pastors report feeling under significant stress  due to their roles. This pressure often results in feelings of isolation and inadequacy. When a pastor grapples with personal issues, the fear of disappointing their congregation can feel suffocating. In another book I'm reading by Lance Witt called "Replenish," he says this: "Ministry demands will always exceed your capacity." I resonate with that. There is always more to do. There is always someone in need. There are always prayers to be prayed. This is why nearly 70% of pastors experience burnout , which leaves them feeling exhausted, disconnected, and many times physically sick. I confess, as a pastor who spends weekdays catering to the needs of others, I often find little time for personal reflection or leisure, leading to feelings of loneliness that can be difficult to shake even though there are people all around me, including my family. The irony is that on sabbatical, I am spending many days alone, but I don't feel lonely. Of course, I miss my wife and family, but that's a different feeling. The difference is that I'm spending more time in personal reflection, working on my relationship with Jesus, exercising, and working with my hands. I'm essentially living within my capacity. This is a skill I will have to learn to balance when I get back to my church and take on the role of pastor once again. I believe things can change, and for the better. It will be better for me and for those in my congregation. I'm less than a month into my sabbatical, so I'm sure this list will get longer, but I think the shifts that I need to take are in the following areas: No More Worshipping at the Altar of Busyness Once again, in the book "Replenish," Lance Witt says: "Busyness will not only distract, it will infect. Your busyness will damage your soul. Over time you will develop a hurried spirit. And even when your body is still, your soul will be racing. Your busy spirit will constantly remind you of everything you need to be doing." In essence, this means that I need to slow down and focus on things that are of greater importance. I need more "be still and know" moments (Psalm 46:10). In reading through the gospels again, I am struck by how often Jesus got away from the crowds to pray, rest, and renew. It was a priority for Jesus so he could have power in ministry. How much more necessary should that be for a broken pastor like me? Fearless Authenticity Many have heard the concept of living from the inside out. That is, letting your deep spiritual life inform and empower what you do in ministry and in life. And that's the way it should be, but I find myself often living from the outside in. I strive to be strong on the outside and put up a good front. After all, I need to take care of the needs of others; people shouldn't be worried about taking care of me. Many pastors long for an environment where they can be their true selves without fear of judgment. We crave relationships where we can be seen as relatable individuals rather than idealized figures as if we were Jesus himself. Too much pressure, and the only way to change that is through authenticity. I realize some might not like the new me (which is the real me) or may be taken aback by more honesty, but God has impressed this on me as a necessity if I want to serve Him well. I really believe that when pastors choose to share their struggles, they foster a culture of honesty within the church. This openness can encourage congregants to share their own challenges and contribute to a supportive community. A pastor’s vulnerability can illustrate a crucial truth: the only perfect example to follow is Jesus. The rest of us lean on God's grace and mercy. So it is vital for you to recognize that your pastor is not infallible. We are human beings called to serve but who also need support and freedom to be themselves in the truest sense. I hope if you're reading this and are under the leadership of a pastor, that at least you will realize that more often than not, the struggles faced by pastors often remain hidden behind the pulpit, but they are undeniably real. Pray for your pastor and encourage him to take care of himself so that he can honor Jesus in all things. Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion, and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all of our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-6 Carry each other's burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

It is one week until I officially leave on my three month sabbatical beginning on August 1. Part of me is really excited for the time away from full-time ministry to rest and rediscover who I am in my relationship with Jesus. As I have said previously, I am also a little bit ambivalent. I've been at my present church for eight years and I'm going to miss my church family, and to be honest I'm going to miss the regular pattern of my life. I am nervous that I will not accomplish what I want to accomplish in my time away. I am worried that I might be bored out of my mind. I am concerned that I will waste the privilege that my church has given me in this time away and not be a good steward of this gift. Of course I have plans for times away and projects I want to accomplish. I even have some things that I want to try to see if they take root. Yet, even with all the planning I am a little bit uncertain which is quite surprising tome because my regular schedule is often uncertain. I do have a regular schedule to my normal week but there are often things that pop up that changed my priorities for the week. A pastor's life is one of uncertainty, change and urgency. So. I am familiar with this feeling but this 'sabbatical uncertainty' is a liitle different because I am entering a time of rest that I haven't had for 40 years. So I've been focusing recently on the words of Isaiah: You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Isa 26:3 Meditating on this verse has been an eye-opener for me. Even before leaving for sabbatical, God is teaching some things about myself. When I am doing ministry, more often than not, I have peace. I trust God to work through me to guide and teach the people God has entrusted to me. This is a no-brainer. I've been doing that sort of ministry for most of my life. If I didn't trust God to work through me, then I would probably resign. So as I try to understand why I have this feeling of uncertainty as I approach sabbatical, maybe the reason is I trust God for my ministry, but I'm not trusting God for.... me . Maybe one of the things that pastors need to look for is the propensity to get so caught up in what they do and therefore tie their personal faith to their ministry, but not their personal faith to everyday life. Does my personal faith enable me to trust that my time away will accomplish everything God wants to accomplish in me even if MY goals are not reached, even if I am bored sometimes, even if God rearranges things so that I steward this time in a way different than I planned? Here's wnat I have discovered about myself. I am fine with the uncertainity I am certain about (that is, the uncertainty of ministry that I am in control of). On the other hand, I need to develop faith in the uncertainty that I can't control. I know that might not make sense. How can you control uncertainty? I control it with familiarity. I am used to certain things happening at random. I am used to the crises. I am used to the things that surround everyday small church ministry. I am certain I can handle it because I always have. I have experienced God's presence and power in those things over and over. Considering a sabbatical changes all that. I don't know what I am getting into. I am excited but a little fearful in wnat God may teach me about me. Maybe when you and I face uncertainty it is because we have to confront (in practice) what we say we believe: I am completely dependent on God for everything, my life, my plans, my health, my church. I am completely dependent on God for ... everything. One thing I pray I learn during this time away is give up the notion that I am in control. I am ok with that because he is good. Speaking to Israel, God says: “It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” Deut 31:8 God has not changed. He is with us in every uncertainty. I want to walk into next week knowing that in my uncertainty, God is certain. May you walk in that truth too.

So I'm almost ready to start my sabbatical. But the burning question that everyone asks is simply this: what exactly is a sabbatical? It sounds like one long vacation where you get paid for doing nothing. I suppose every Pastor going on a sabbatical has to "defend" the fact that this isn't just a extended vacation, but something that is necessary and beneficial for any congregation. That need to defend probably is because churches have not taught the necessity of a balanced rhythm in life. We hear the words sabbatical and we think old testament law and throw it away. But even though we are not bound by the law anymore, the principle that God gave at creation of taking a break is a utmost importance, especially in our fast paced world of constant burnout. So before I tackle the initial question, let me step back a bit and ask a more foundational question. Is a sabbatical biblical? The word 'sabbatical' is rooted in the Hebrew word Shabbat ( שָׁבַת) and there's a lot of biblical tradition surrounding the use of that word. The most obvious is the practice of a sabbath day described initially in Genesis chapter one. God reste d (יִּשְׁבֹּת) on t he seventh day and tells his people to have a weekly observance of Sabbath to develop a rhythm of life that would help us balance our lives in both our bodies, minds, and spiritual lives. The Sabbath was made for a humankind, and not humankind for the Sabbath; so the son of man is Lord, even of the Sabbath. Mark 2:27–28. Additionally, in Leviticus 25, God commands that the land, lie fallow every seven years. Even the land needed a sabbatical to recover from the yearly rotation of harvesting crops to replenish the nutrients in the soil. In the same way, Leviticus 25 also talks about the Year of Jubilee - every 50 years a big celebration happens where there is no harvest or producing of anything, but rather debts are forgiven and offerings are made to God. So biblically, Sabbath in all it's forms, has the idea of rest, rejuvenation, renewal and celebration. These things, for a time, take the place of hard work and production. Marva Dawn in her book Keeping the Sabbath Wholly says: "We cease not only from work itself, but also from the need to accomplish and be productive, from the worry and tension that accompany our modern criterion of efficiency, from our efforts to be in control of our lives, as if we were God, from a possessiveness and our enculturation, and finally, from the humdrum and meaninglessness that result when life is pursued without the Lord at the center of it all." So what is a sabbatical? It can take many forms as long as those key biblical ideas are part of the process. So here is a stab at a definition of sabbatical at least for me. A sabbatical is an extended period of time away offered to leaders of a church in order to equip both the leader and the church for the next season of ministry. This is done, not only by enhancing a leader skills, but also by providing a space away from the "tyranny of the urgent" for spiritual renewal, rest, celebration, study in order to reconnect on a personal (rather than professional) level with God and influential people in the pastor's life. So you can call it an extended study leave, a renewal leave, a refresher leave. Call it what you want, but the benefit of a sabbatical, especially for a pastor, is to remove oneself from the busyness of life since our job often entails living without any margins at all so that we can practice the sabbatical disciplines of rest, rejuvenation, renewal, and celebration. This short-term sabbatical and the regular practice of Sabbath rhythm of life, can help prepare the pastor for a long-term ministry rather than short-term career burnout. So what are some of the things I may be doing? This list is not exhaustive nor is it set in stone, but will give you an idea of what my time away might look like Study and Continuing Education Reading books primarily on self care and long term ministry Going to Athens, Ephesus and Corinth to strengthen my faith in its historical roots. Beginning to write a book or study guide on a relevant topic that comes from initial things I learn. Personal Rest Reading, praying and pursuing spiritual disciplines to deepen my own faith. Relearning self care: talking with mentors and counselors. exercise, including backpacking for an extended time. Road trip to re-connect with old friends and ministry partners Rejuvenation and Celebration Devoting more time to my wife including time away. Attending worship services in a variety of plavces to expand my understanding of worship, church and family. Celebrating my 40th Anniversary with a trip with my wife. Renewal Rediscover Spiritual Disciplines that feed my relationaship with Jesus. Especially the discipline of reading the Scriptures Devotionally (Instead of for study or sermon prep.) . How can the church family help make this sabbatical beneficial? Pray consistently for my family, and the congregation throughout the sabbatical. Put in extra effort to assist the church by attending regularly, serving, donating, reaching out, and praying. Participate FULLY in the church Program that will be happening while I'm away If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me. But remember, I leave on August 1st and won't be back or in contact till November 1st. If there is an emergency or concern during that time, please call an elder and they will be glad to help. Also, if you subscribe to the blog on the main page ( www.pastorsprogress.org ) , you will get notifications whenever a new blog post is up. Be Blessed

Contrary to what people might think, a pastoral sabbatical is not a break from worship. It is not a vacation from Jesus or church, attendance or Bible reading or anything of the sort. By-the-way, this applies to both the pastor and the congregation. This false perception is where the danger lies because the purpose of sabbatical is the exact opposite. As I've written about before, the essence of a sabbatical is to take a break from the every day patterns that we get drawn into that can drain the passion, joy, innovation, and vibrant faith from our lives. A time of sabbatical helps us rediscover our relationship with the Lord without the pressure of every day life crowding in. Even the apostle Paul recognized this in his life when he said: "Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches." 2 Cor 11:28 So what does that look like both for the Pastor that is on sabbatical and the church who is hopefully using the sabbatical break to renew and rediscovered themselves outside the leadership of the pastor? For the Pastor it means that I get to go and worship God without having to think about what I'm going to preach or what needs might come up or anything else that has to do with every day Pastor ministry. I get to rediscover who I am in the presence of the Lord. I mean, it's just me and Jesus not Pastor Phil and Jesus. There is a freedom to worship without the burden of concern for a short period of time. There is a great difference between knowing and preaching the theology of redemption and just spending time with Jesus and thanking him for MY redemption. Those in my congregation have heard me talk about this a little bit. It is very difficult for a pastor, especially one who has been in ministry about 30 years straight to simply sit and worship God without any responsibilities. Plus there's even the added benefit that I can sit with my wife and family... maybe even hold her hand during worship. You see, it's the little things that matter so much sometimes that those of us in full-time ministry don't get to experience all that often. The first danger for the pastor during a sabbatical is that he doesn't take that break from the normal routine. I know guys that have gone on sabbatical and have preached in other churches. I personally believe that's problematic. Not that I don't think that a pastor should do some service during his sabbatical, but it should be different than what he normally does. The second danger is that the pastor doesn't worship at all, and takes a complete break from all things that are "churchy." You can't be you unless you worship. We were created to worship and that's something that should never be cut out for any reason because it lies at the essence of who we are as followers of Jesus. You can't be you unless you worship. For the church , a sabbatical means that they can rediscover themselves outside of the pastoral leadership. In fact, a sabbatical will give some sort of idea how well the pastor is doing his job. Paul summarizes a Pastor/Elder's job like this in Ephesians: "So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up." Ephesians 4:11-12 So on a practical level, what that means is the congregation will have to discover what their spiritual gifts are to fill in for the ministry that the pastor normally does. If the pastor has not trained people and has done all the ministry himself the church might stagger and stumble. But if the pastor has done a good job, the people will pick up the football and run it to victory. I am excited about my church exploring their abilities and gifts. I am hoping that ministry will increase while I am gone so that when I can come back, I am not filling in any gaps because God's people are right there. But here is the danger for those in the congregation. They may see my sabbatical as a time to take a break from worship, and in doing that, like the danger for the pastor that's similar above, they may not discover who they really are in Christ. They may not live in the power of the resurrection and rejoice in the spiritual gift that God has given them for the producing of much spiritual fruit. So my brothers and sisters, whatever you do, do not take a break from the body. Attend worship regularly. Participate as much as you can in the renewal programs that are going on in the congregation. But why even bother go? I can think of a number of reasons. Don't stop worshiping and attending services because: No one is a second class member. Everyone is needed and of utmost importance to the body of Christ. If you don't show up, you might miss what God wanted to teach you that day If you don't show up, you might miss out on the opportunity to help someone God wanted you to help that day If you don't show up your understanding of who Jesus is, will not grow because you have not worshiped If you don't show up, you proclaim to the world that there are things more important than worshiping the god of creation. If you don't show up, somebody else will have to pick up your football with gifts that they don't have and fill in the gap that God created you to do. If you don't show up, you may grow in Christ, but you won't grow together with your brothers and sisters in Christ and that's the whole purpose of having a family. If you don't show up, something will be missing from our church and we will be poorer for it. Sabbatical is not a vacation. It's not a vacation for the Pastor from church. It's not a vacation for the congregation from church either. It is a unique opportunity to grow in ways that otherwise would be almost impossible. So be proactive and determined to worship and grow during this sabbatical and renewal period for if you do, you won't be in danger but rather be a dangerous warrior for the Lord.

Reading List Preparation and the Need for Renewal Part of the goal for any sabbatical is the idea of renewal. I think this is necessary for any job or career we might have. Especially since, in the Western world our identities are often connected to what we do for a living. Of course this is unhealthy. At a very basic level, my identity is not wrapped up in what I do, but in who I am – specifically for the Christian, who I am in Christ. So renewal is partly the process of breaking away from what you do to rediscover who you are. The ultimate benefit of renewal is when one returns to their normal life, they can continue doing their job more effectively because they are serving out of who they are and not out of some other reason such as "I need to make money" or out of guilt because I'm supposed to do this job and I can't find another. Whatever the reason, there is no sustained power in those reasons nor will a person find joy and purpose in their job. Burn out, short term or long-term, is inevitable. Biblically, humans were created to work. Work was a blessing, giving to human beings before the fall. Of course the fall radically transformed our work so the need for some sort of renewal or revision is really important if we are going to finish strong in whatever we do. With that mind, one of the books that I plan on reading is Pastoral Pause: A Practical Guide to Renewal Leave by Gregg Pimlott. Maybe you want to read along with me? I would love to hear what you think about the book (comment below). Or, if you're part of my congregation, I want to hear all about what God taught you about renewal and restoration when I get back. I'll keep you posted as I build my reading list for this fall. Blessings.

ADDRESSING THE UNCERTAINTY OF LEAVING FOR BOTH PASTOR AND CONGREGATION. I have been in the ministry for a little more than 40 years. Beginning in August I will take my first sabbatical ever. I want to begin by thanking my present church and giving me this much needed opportunity. Yet, as I begin my sabbatical in a little over two months from now, I confess that I have some jitters. There is a mix of excitement and expectation along with nervousness and uncertainty. I'm sure many in my congregation feel that way as well, as they are probably experiencing a pastoral sabbatical for the first time I have been convinced for a long time that I needed a sabbatical if I was going to be a long-term pastor and finish well. "But at the same time, leaving the people in my church, the fellowship, and the familiarity of our worship—even re-ordering the way I manage my time—brings a level of uncertainty that I've never experienced before. I know that this sabbatical will strengthen my relationship with God and improve my well-being. Still, I can’t help but wonder how this process will impact my congregation. So, I just wanted to quickly jot down the benefits of a sabbatical, not only for a pastor's health and spiritual growth but also for the congregation's health and spiritual growth. Sabbaticals are a valuable gift for pastors; they offer a chance to pause, reflect, and focus on self-care and spiritual renewal. For me, this means stepping back from daily responsibilities and rediscovering my personal walk with Jesus. As I've expressed before to my congregation, having pastoral responsibilities for years on end establishes a pattern in your life where every time you try to worship outside your congregation, you are still in Pastor mode. That is, when another pastor is preaching. It is very common to desensitize oneself to the speaking of the Holy Spirit because we are always wondering would I preach that differently? Should he have said this or that? I like this order of service. We should try that song in worship. etc. A sabbatical gives a pastor the time he needs to break that cycle so he can just become simply - a worshiper. Sabbatical also give pastors the opportunity to dive deep into personal self-care. We can get so busy that we neglect, exercise, eating, right, and good deep friendships. These things are not only good but necessary for a healthy ministry. I also look forward to reading books that I want to read rather than the ones I need to read for ministry. I eagerly anticipate connecting with God in new ways and allowing His Spirit to teach me new things. But what about the benefits for my congregation? To be honest with you, as I prepare for my sabbatical, I am genuinely concerned about how it will affect our congregation. Over the past 8 years, I have invested my energy in teaching and training the people in our church as the Scriptures and instruct me to do. My primary job as a pastor according to Ephesians 4:11-12 is to help equip each of you with the necessary tools and spiritual gifts to thrive in ministry. So I am leaving, trusting that my ministry has had an impact. And that while I'm gone, the church won't just survive but thrive because each one will step up and serve powerfully the way God has called them to. This is an exciting thing, because when I get back if the church is thriving, then I can just jump in on that momentum. This is where I realize that this sabbatical is just as crucial for you as it is for me. So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up. Ephesians 4:11-12 So, while I'm away, I encourage each of you to discover, experiment and refine your spiritual gifts. You are empowered to lead, serve, and be part of the body of Jesus at West Dighton Christian Church. This period will offer you a unique opportunity to explore and practice these gifts. There will be some training sessions that I encourage you all to attend. I'm praying that you will come to worship services regularly so you can grow together as a family, learning from one another and loving one another, so that the unity among us will be at an all-time high when I return on November first. This sabbatical will test how well I’ve prepared you for ministry. Have I nurtured you enough, helping you to develop the abilities needed to be the church serving one another and serving community? Though I am nervous, I am also encouraged because research shows that communities that empower their members during leadership transitions often see a boost in engagement and growth, sometimes up to 30%. Don't use the three months I'm away to just glide. Don't use it to catch up on other things that aren't 'church stuff.' This is an excellent opportunity to use this time to deepen your faith, both individually and collectively. Pray for one another, provide support, and seek opportunities to witness God’s goodness. Find your gift and take a step of risky faith and see what God can do. While the thought of leaving generates pre-sabbatical jitters, I am filled with joy thinking about how this experience has a great potential for growth and depth in our church. So, as much as you're trusting in me to make the most of this time away, I am doing the same for you. Asking God to pour out his spirit in such a way that we are compelled to do everything for his glory. This sabbatical is a leap of faith for all of us—a time for me to recharge and for you to thrive in your call as Mighty Warriors, – servants of the most high God.